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Focus on the bright side

I admit this has been hard for me. Mainly because of the people who I spend time with. These people always talk about their past, their regrets, their old glory days. They do nothing but criticize me and focus on my shortcomings. It is true that you are the average of the 5 people you spend most time with. But, that is a topic that deserves a whole other post.

Focusing on the bright side doesn’t mean being fake and saying “Praise the Lord” all the time. It doesn’t mean that you are minimizing your problems or struggles. It doesn’t mean you should compare your life to a homeless person and make yourself feel guilty for not being homeless. 

I remember reading somewhere in Jonathan’s (Jonathan Lockwood Huie) website (http://www.how-to-self.com/), that it is good to compare your life to those less fortunate than you and to count your blessings and develop gratitude. But, such excessive comparisons could lead you to feeling self-contempt and the feeling that your problems or struggles are not important (Sorry Jonathan, if these are not the exact words, but I read it years ago! :-)).

I have noticed from my own experience that the above is true –  that such excessive comparisons (with the aim of developing gratitude) could actually cause you to feel resentment towards yourself for considering your problem ‘problems’. My friend, that is not the aim of gratitude. Gratitude doesn’t aim your resentment or making you feel guilty for the blessings that God has already bestowed on you. Gratitude means being genuinely thankful and joyous and happy about what you do have so that it will make you just that – happy. And once you are happy, it will be easier for you to go after the things that are missing. Agree? And once you are happy, you are more likely to help those who are less fortunate than you are. Remember, the Lord loves a cheerful giver 🙂 

Terri Savelle Foy – The Highest Expression of Your Faith – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwGhCciy470

So, what does it mean to look on the bright side?

It means to look at your life without any comparison. It means to look at your life and see what is going right, see what is going your way, see what is there. And enjoy those things 🙂 Turn your head away from all the parts that are missing.

Thank God for what you do have.

Now ask for God’s wisdom and provision for all the things that are missing and that are not going your way. And listen for his wisdom. Wait for his answers.

Think if you can do anything about the parts that are missing – even in a small way.

If your husband died, would it hurt to look for a new relationship? For a new man? Who knows – maybe he will love you more than your ex-husband did 🙂

If things aren’t going your way, ask yourself why? Why did I end up in this country when I wanted to be half-way across the world? Is it due to divine intervention? Has God himself put you in the country where you are now? If He has, I encourage and I warn you not to manipulate that decision. Because if God has put you in the country when He knew perfectly well this is not where you wanted to be, He has his reasons.

Firstly, he is trying to protect you.

Secondly, your best life is in the country where you are at.

Thirdly, the person that God wanted you to be could only be developed in this country.

Fourthly, you have divine connections and true friends and amazing opportunities and life-changing experiences here – exactly where you are at.

The country example is from my own experience 🙂

If things aren’t going your way, ask God why? I have heard it said that we should not question God and we should not ask God “why”? But, I don’t believe this. There is nothing wrong with asking God “why”. I mean he won’t bite your head off if you do. 🙂

I wish I had asked God “why” in the past. If I had, maybe I could have avoided some mistakes and heartache and who knows I might have received some answers 🙂

Usually God does something, when you ask why. He could give you answers – the real reason. Or he will encourage you to stop worrying about things not going your way and will avert your gaze from the problem. This is what he did for me. He orchestrated a situation where he encouraged me to stop worrying about things not going my way and he encouraged me to avert my gaze from the problem. If that happens, obey quickly. If you do, you will feel better. I didn’t. So, I had to be miserable for a long time. And because of my misery, I ended up making a couple of poor choices, because of which I am still crying.

It is hard I know, especially when you have been dreaming so long about having a guy with big ears and you end up with someone with not-so-big ears. Lame example, I know.

I encourage you to check out the links below. They are very helpful.

Don’t be like the guy who missed his gift because it wasn’t wrapped the way he expected –  http://www.dailykindness.com/the-boy-who-didnt-want-a-bible

The Car Key and the Bible – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRYPZI8bsek

Joel Osteen – The God who Closes Doors – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2BAshKeUIm8

Joel Osteen – Trusting God to do it His Way – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rujPTZhe7lg

Terri Savelle Foy – The Highest Expression of Your Faith – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwGhCciy470

 

 

 

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2 thoughts on “Focus on the bright side

  1. I so agree about what gratitude really is. This is a good post. I have a question though. I am not seeing a “home” page or an “about” page. I’m also not seeing a list of your older posts, etc. Are you new to blogging. I like your posts but would also like to know more about you. Again, I really like your thoughts on this post.

    • Thank you Rebecca..yes i am new to blogging..i started this blog in june…ermm i am not an Expert in wordpress..i just assumed people could see my older posts and about me – because i am able to see them on others’ blogs..will look into it..thanks for letting me know..

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